Sunday, 29 December 2013

Aspie girl super powers series-our story

It's been a long time since I last posted a blog post. I apologies. Over these months whenever someone has asked the usual "so, what's been happening?" I've just been answering the usual automated response of "aw, not much, you?" Truth is, it wouldn't matter what I had been up to, I'd still use the same response, it's my autopilot response. And these days autopilot is my reliable stand-in when I am at the end of coping. The last few months have been a season of learning for us, as a family, and as things have come to light it's put us a path of more learning. Obviously as parents we are learning all the time, adapting our styles to suit, changing out what doesn't work and implementing things that we hope will work. I hope all parents see it that way, we not only teach out children but they also, teach us, a lot. What the heck am I talking about? What is this curve ball that I'm cryptically attempting to communicate? Well, allow me to start at the start, because.. Well, what better place to start?! 
12 months ago we had a scheduled pediatric appt for the twins, to check on their prematurity related health issues, only I bought up some other things that had been a bit of a concern, you see both boys had learned to talk and wave and point and communicate and suddenly that all stopped, they withdraw into themselves and often had a blank gaze.
You think you know where I'm going with this? (You probably don't)
Anyway, I had done some research and the doctor confirmed that indeed these were red flag behaviours for autism spectrum disorder, so we went on a waiting list for assessment and early intervention. And nothing further happened. 
Wait! ...what? 
That's right the wait list referrals disappeared off the system and nothing further happened. But, the boys have both progressed again, speaking and communicating. Now, while we do still have concerns we aren't pushing it at the moment, I know there are sensory issues and dietary issues and our parenting style has adjusted to be more understanding of that but that's all we can do for the time being. So that's the curve ball? Not quite, you see, by researching the autism spectrum the realization hit that we had missed something, our little girls 'quirks' fit too neatly into the aspergers diagnosis. I went through the denial stage for a while before bringing it forward to show hubby what I had been stressing about. I had to be sure I was doing the right thing before i said anything. So that started the appointments, we spent a couple of months with gp and psych visits and finally a peadiatrician again and the diagnosis was confirmed. Our little girl is in fact on the spectrum, official diagnosis is aspergers. She also has sensory issues and anxiety. That's the curve ball! Just as I thought it was going one way, it went another. And yes, it was a shock, even though deep down I knew it was true, I went to the appts waiting to hear that I was wrong and just needed to adjust my parenting to help my little girl flourish- and the later there yes that still applies, we did need to adjust our parenting to help our little girl flourish, and we have been adjusting, and you know what?! We will continue to, with each season of our lives, our children's lives, each issue we all face, everything changes us slightly, and one could only hope that it's for the better.  So this season of change has been big, we also decided to resign from being foster carers so we could focus on our children and their needs for a while. We are about to start therapies with a team of specialist, and our little girl is settling into school so this season has been very full on. I don't know if or when I will be able to post more projects, the blog may or may not take a new direction, I hope some of my readers will continue to follow this journey :) 

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